there's a group i am part of the leadership for and for a couple of months we have been having some tension due to a particular person's leadership style. the person decided to step back--"take a break"--for a while and the rest of the leadership team has been carrying on without this person just fine. actually, we work really well together now. however, this person keeps planning events and using the group's mailing list as the audience to these events. needless to say, the members of the group still believe that: 1. this person is still part of the leadership--the person was pretty adamant to making it public that he/she is not actively leading the group; and 2. they go through this person when they have event ideas, or suggestions , etc. to me this is very frustrating because this person is not abiding by the original decision that he/she made in terms of taking a break from the group, but also, it's like there are these weird competing schedules. i want what's best for the group so if i go to be events and try to support the a sense of community. however, this person is just being childish and not submitting to the leadership's authority. what really irked me today is that while everyone was talking and the topic of planning a mission's trip for the group came up. mind you, i was the only member of the leadership team left. someone asked, "so who are the leaders of the group, you two?" and i was totally put on the spot. do i tell them, no, this person isn't, it's just so and so, and, so and so? if i had done that i fear that it would have opened a can of worms with people asking questions, etc. so i mentioned the leadership team's names and left it at that. however, i didn't clarify if the other person was or not. after that, i left. i didn't really feel like going to the activity to begin with and was planning to leave early but after that, i know that my mind was going to be somewhere else and i'd be blocking everything anyone said.
i walked home from Copley to Central Square and took the train the rest of the way. i just feel very disappointed that this person keeps trying to show the world that he/she has a leadership role in the group. if you want to lead it so much, why make the decision to leave? if you want the well being of the group why keep trying to have parallel agendas? ahhhhhhhhhh! i just don't get it. i like things to be transparent; i like things to be clear. call me anal but if i had been in that position, if someone had asked if i lead something that i know i don't, i would have just clarified it right then and there. but no, instead this person starts talking as to how the calendar for the group needs to include this and that, etc. this is too much. i just feel sad and disappointed with this. it makes me not want to be part of a group where someone's need to be involved, and their clear emotional need for others to be around rules the way we have to engage. i don't know what to do and hope that God reveals to me where i need to change and/or how i can get be receptive to something i'm not seeing/understanding. i hate this! i really do!
1 comment:
Confrontation with 'leila' is in order. Planned, of course, but roles need to be defined as to what's what and who does it. Unchecked, the morale will drop, efficiency won't be as it should be, and the group will lack focus and clear direction. Even Jesus took out the whip and let a few fly when His Father's house was in disarray :-P
Post a Comment